Most of the plays listed below are in the 10-20 minute range, and many of them are comedies. If you are interested in producing or publishing any of them, please contact me at timlehnert22@gmail.com.
Two bird-watchers fight over proper forest behavior after a possible sighting of the very rare Square Billed Sapphire (SBS). A rifle-toting SBS poacher interrupts their tussle, and the birders unite in their opposition to this monster, who turns out not to be who they first thought.
Comedy. 3 actors. 10 minutes.
Performances: Lakeshore Center for the Arts (Westfield, NY); Theatre Oxford (Oxford, MS).
Madison and Sophie, high-achieving high school seniors, are waiting to meet an admissions dean at the super-elite College. To gain entry to the College, you have to really want it, and that means defeating the competition, even if you have to bend the truth.
Comedy/drama. 2 actors. 12 minutes.
Performances: Firehouse Center for the Arts New Works Festival (Newburyport, MA).
Jeffrey, accompanied by his new dog, Bagel, returns to the animal shelter from where the pooch was adopted. Bagel is proving to be difficult as he won’t stop spouting his views on political and social issues. Bagel’s constant opinionating is disrupting the tranquil home life Jeffrey strives for, and he demands that the shelter take the dog back.
Comedy. 3 actors. 10 minutes.
Performances: Actors’ Theatre (Santa Cruz, CA); Camino Real Playhouse (San Juan Capistrano, CA; performed for a canine audience as a fundraiser for a dog rescue!); Wilbury Theatre Group (Providence, RI) and as part of the Boston Theatre Marathon.
A vacation house is mistakenly rented to two diametrically opposed couples for the same week. One couple tries using their theater background to make the best of the situation, but it only seems to make matters worse.
Comedy. 6 actors. 13 minutes.
Performances: The Artists’ Exchange (Cranston, RI); Forge Theater Company (Westford, MA performed virtually as part of the 2020 Boston Theatre Marathon); McCall-Donnelly High School (McCall, ID); Hand-to-Mouth Players, 30th Annual Playwright/Director’s Workshop (Westchester Collaborative Theater, Ossining, NY); Hand-to-Mouth Players, Theatre Association of New York State (TANYS) 2024 Festival, Watertown, NY.
Jay and Sheila are celebrating their anniversary at the Lavatory, the trendiest restaurant in town. They don’t seem up to the task as the menu is indecipherable, and they begin to snipe at each other. The Lavatory’s inattentive and spacey waiter and arrogant chef are no help at all, and what should be a special night is becoming a disaster. When The Lavatory requires that they pass a test before being allowed to order, Jay and Sheila realize they’ll have to work together to get what they want.
Comedy. 4 actors. 17 minutes.
Performances: Enter Stage Left Theater – A Play, a Pint & a Pie One-Act Play Festival (Hopkinton Center for the Arts, Hopkinton, MA).
A museum-goer sitting on a bench is accused by a security guard of damaging what the guard claims is a work of art. The two argue, and the guard is revealed as an artist who is creating an interactive piece. When further museum “guards,” “patrons,” and “artists” appear and contradict and negate their predecessors, the museum-goer, and audience, are left wondering if getting punked can be art.
Comedy. 5 actors. 10 minutes.
Performances: Camino Real Playhouse (San Juan Capistrano, CA); Wilbury Theatre Group (Providence, RI) and as part of the Boston Theatre Marathon.
It should be all in a day’s work for all-star reliever Eric Kearns to face slugger Lance Hendricks, but the ace pitcher has got a lifetime of personal baggage to unpack first.
Comedy. 5-6 actors. 12 minutes.
Performances: Artists Exchange (Cranston, RI); Carrollwood Players Theatre (Tampa, FL); Crafton Hills College (Yucaipa, CA).
An app enables pubgoers to have the “optimal” pub experience, but of course things are never that simple.
Comedy. 3 actors. 10 minutes.
Performances: Gemco Players Community Theatre (Emerald, Victoria, Australia).
The Debt (a four-part series best performed via audio or Zoom). Available upon request.
Comedy/drama. 3 actors 10 minutes.
Episode one opens with Bobby, an enforcer for crime boss Big Neck, on a Zoom call with gambling addict Steve. In normal times, he would menace Steve in-person, but these are not normal times (even the Mob has had to go virtual). When Big Neck gets on the call, Steve becomes truly alarmed, but it turns out that Big Neck has had a COVID-related awakening and proposes forgiving the debt. Moreover, Big Neck wants to start a charitable betting pool to benefit street-level crooks like Bobby, whose income has been devastated by the pandemic. At episode one’s end, Bobby and Steve have been tasked with selling tickets for the pool, and Big Neck is ruminating on establishing the Big Neck Foundation (BNF).
How do Bobby and Steve fare as salesmen? And how does Big Neck’s colleague and former competitor, Hang Nail, and Catherine, a non-profit consultant, fit into the BNF picture? Finally, does Steve’s latest obsession, betting on Korean baseball, pay off for him? All is revealed by the end of episode four.
Comedy/drama. 5 actors. 50-55 minutes (radio or Zoom).
Performed by the Wilbury Theatre Group on Zoom in Summer 2020.
The Campaign (available upon request)
A politician about to launch his next campaign requests a meeting with a former staffer to clarify a past sexual encounter. The conversation proves illuminating for the ex-staffer, and unsettling for them both.
Drama. 2 actors. 7 minutes.
Talkin’ Blues (available upon request).
A podcaster is thrilled to interview one his idols, a veteran blues musician, but the conversation goes doesn’t go as he’d hoped, as the bluesman is grumpy and suspicious. Eventually they do find common ground, and the podcaster is saved from complete disaster by his guest.
Drama/comedy. 2 actors. 14 minutes.
Performance (staged reading): Shawnee Playhouse, Shawnee Original Playwrights Festival (Shawnee, PA).
Pedro, Bert & Roy (available upon request). Best performed as audio, Zoom, or staged reading.
Lucie has hired Roy to kill her husband, Bert; however, COVID restrictions are interfering with Roy doing the job. As Roy and Lucie discuss the plan over a series of phone calls, her shifting romantic life saps her desire to have Bert killed. Ultimately, Lucie learns that she is less in control of Bert’s fate than she thinks.
Comedy. 2 actors. 11 minutes.
Performance (staged reading via Zoom): Central PA Playwriting Festival of Shorts & One-Acts (State College, PA)
King’s Wish Day (available upon request).
It’s King’s Wish Day, a once-yearly event where subjects come before the King to make a humble request to improve the kingdom. One clueless requester doesn’t want a new footbridge for his hamlet, he wants to meet the King’s daughter (the Princess). This cheeky demand falls flat, but the King’s courtier, an avid gamer, falls madly in and out of love with a fellow Galaxy 500 devotee, and the Princess learns of a potential suitor from the north.
Comedy. 6 actors. 25 minutes.
Allegations (available upon request).
Lauren and Nick are looking forward to seeing their favorite band in concert that night, but learn of troubling allegations directed at the lead singer. Should they still attend?
Drama. 3 actors. 10 minutes.
Rattus Norvegicus (available upon request).
The suburban town of Bucolic Acres is infested with rats. Several neighbors meet to strategize on how to rid themselves of the scourge, but can’t agree on what to do, until an unlikely savior emerges.
Comedy. 6 actors. 17 minutes.
The Ginsu Guys go to Winnipeg (available upon request).
In the mid-1970s in Warwick, Rhode Island, Ed Valenti and Barry Becher headed Dial Media, a pioneer in the field of “direct marketing,” using television ads to sell products directly to consumers, bypassing retail stores. Their hits included the Miracle Painter, Armourcote Cookware, the Chainge necklace, and the legendary Ginsu Knife. Eighteen-hundred miles to the northwest in Winnipeg, Manitoba, Phil Kives and his cousin Ray were at the helm of the K-Tel empire. In its early days, K-Tel sold such gadgets as the Miracle Brush, but by the 1970s it had become famous for its heavily-advertised music compilations.
In 1977, the Ginsu guys traveled from Rhode Island to K-Tel’s headquarters in Canada for a meeting with the Kives brothers, an episode briefly recounted in Valenti and Becher’s book The Wisdom of Ginsu. This dramatization is inspired by that story.
Comedy/drama. 5 actors. 10 minutes.
The Old Place (available upon request).
Architecture and history buffs Ian and Alix are enjoying renting a historic house for the weekend when a nostalgic stranger shows up wanting to see how the place has changed.
Drama. 3 actors. 10 minutes.
It’s Never About What They Say (available upon request).
Can what those running a psychology experiment tell subjects ever be taken at face value?
Comedy/drama. 5 actors. 14 minutes.
The Test (available upon request).
Taking a workplace drug test is a simple matter, unless you’re opposed, philosophically or otherwise.
Drama/comedy. 2 actors 12 minutes.
Tim Lehnert 